Happy Friday, loves!
I hope you had the best week! The Nordstrom Anniversary Sale started yesterday so be sure to check out my favorite feminine picks here. 😉 Today’s blog post, however, is about a more serious issue: my experiences with age-related societal pressure and how I’ve overcome them. We’ve all felt this way at some point and I think it’s an important topic to address.
How to Deal with Age-Related Societal Pressure
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Cece Dress c/o | Seychelles Mules c/o | Ellen & James Handbag (similar here) | SugarFix Necklace x/o | Rocksbox Cuff
We live in a society where everything is scheduled and there’s pressure to get everything done by a certain age. There is a “right” way to do things. You’re told to go to college, find a husband, buy a house, have a baby, and land that dream career on a strict timeline. Everyone else seems to have a plan for you and when things just don’t work out that way, they don’t understand it. It’s “what people do” and I know we’ve all felt like this at some point in our life.
I’ve been married for just over five years and I can’t tell you how many times I get asked about when we are planning to start a family (at least a few times a week). I mean, I guess it’s pretty natural to assume that it’s the next big step in someone’s life so I get it. It’s gotten to the point where someone has even told me that I don’t want to have kids because I don’t like kids, which is completely untrue (hello! I subbed for five years!) and an unnecessary and hurtful assumption. To be honest, I’m just not ready for that. I’m not at the point in my life where I feel secure enough to start a family and there are still so many things I want to accomplish. I want to travel and experience things that I feel I wouldn’t be able to do as much of otherwise. I want to enjoy every moment with my husband and the freedom that we share. I want to take advantage of every opportunity that comes my way because I know I won’t always be able to. Yet as each year rolls around, I also feel worried that too much time is passing and that there’s only a limited time window left.
I’ve also felt like this in my career. I was always a straight A student and had a plan for my life. I only wanted to be one thing and I worked my butt off to get there. While I was being hurdled over obstacles and getting rejected left and right, I watched as my peers “surpassed” me in their career journeys. While they starting down their successful career paths as traditional working professionals, I felt like I was being left behind. I was stuck chasing the only dream I ever had and getting nowhere. People always questioned me and told me that I should just give up and settle into a more traditional career. Settle. They said it was easier and that’s what normal people do. Chasing my dream was terrifying, especially when no one else understood. And when I finally started to make it happen, I worried that it was now “too late” and I wished that I had figured out how to do this years ago.
But I didn’t. That’s because everything happens when it’s supposed to. Cast aside the fear of what other’s think and what you are “supposed to do.” Do what makes YOU happy and what you feel is right for your own life. We are in charge of our own destinies and not everyone’s life or journey looks the same. We all want different things at different times and we shouldn’t have to abide by society’s timeline or rules for our life. And we most certainly shouldn’t feel guilty or bad about ourselves if it means that we do things at a later time than others. We are never “too old” for anything – not for love, not for buying a home, not for switching careers, and not for chasing after your dreams. Live your life without limitations and trust that things happen when they should…because in my experience, they always do. 😉
Have you ever felt any age-related societal pressure?
xo
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Thanks so much Samantha!
Aw I’m so happy to help! I’m always here if you need to talk <3
Hehe! Thanks so much Lisa! <3
Thanks so much girlie!
Thanks so much Laura Leigh! You are too sweet!
I’m so happy to help! You are NEVER too old to change careers. I think you should follow your heart and create something that allows you live up to your full potential. If you are passionate about something, just do it. 🙂
Right?! That hurt me so much! I was like “hello?! obviously that’s not the case!” haha!
Yes, girl! You are killing it by doing what you love and what you are good at! Everything happens in it’s own time, which is completely different for everyone.
So true! And that is amazing! We all want different things and I’m glad you followed your heart <3
Thanks so much Annelise!
You are so right!
Exactly! We are all different so that means our lives are different too!
Exactly! And that’s another thing. I’m totally all for education, but sometimes it’s just not right for some people and that’s completely okay. Not going to college (or not graduating) doesn’t mean that you’ve failed and it’s definitely possible to make a great living without doing so.
Exactly! Things happen when they are supposed to happen. Haha! Thank you for that!!
It totally does! I’m getting to that point now. Some people don’t understand and that’s okay. They don’t need to 🙂
Thanks so much Denay! So happy to help. You definitely did not start too late. I strongly believe that there is room for everyone and that there is a specific audience for all of us that needs to hear what we have to say, no matter our age. I love that you can use this to show your girls what can be accomplished with a little bit of hard work and whole lot of passion!
You are so right! So sorry to hear about all hardships – it can definitely be stressful when people put into their two cents. Hoping things are better now <3
Thanks so much Jacqui!
Yes! So much truth!
Haha! So true. It never ends…there is always something people are curious about. I think most people mean well, but it’s difficult for some people, especially where children are concerned.
Right?! This is exactly what I think of when people ask. You never know what struggles others are going through and although it may be well-intentioned, it could also be extremely painful for the couple.
Thanks so much Kileen!
Thanks so much Avani!
You are so welcome! So glad to help <3
Haha “old maid”! Oh my gosh, your comment made me laugh so hard because it’s so true! I’m in my early 30s now so of course people are inviting I have kids before it’s “too late.” The timing is just not right and I trust that things will happen if and when they should. But you know what? It’s MY life and I have to live it…not them. Kudos to you for living life how you want to!
Exactly! I once was told that I was “selfish” for not wanting children. I responded by saying, “No, selfish is knowing that I’m not really up for the challenge, having them anyway, and then only half-heartedly raising them. I’m being responsible.” I hope you escape conversations like that bc they can be absolutely maddening.
Thanks so much Jasmine!
Thanks so much Jess! They really do but luckily, we have the choice to live our own lives on our terms (even though a lot of people don’t understand it). And age should never be a factor when pursuing your dreams.