HAPPY NEW YEAR! And wow, what a year it has been 🙂
I absolutely adore the new year! It’s a time of reflection, excitement and hope for a new beginning. At the end of each year, I love to reflect on the previous year – what went well, what needs to be worked on and the valuable lessons I’ve learned through it all. It’s an incredibly vulnerable time where I share details surrounding my life, feelings and thoughts. To be honest, I’m a fairly private person and I don’t get too personal on here but this is actually something I’m working on as I’d love to share more 🙂
During this time, I love to go through all of my previous year in review posts just to see how much I’ve grown and how much I’ve learned over time. To me, this is one of the most incredible things about having a blog. It’s like a journal of sorts and it’s so interesting how as I read, I can recall each emotion that I felt during that time. It’s such an emotional process… but in the best way. Going through my old posts has given me reassurance that everything happens for a reason and that even in the darkest of moments, it was all working out to my benefit. Reflecting on this past year has shown me truly WHY things happen the way they do and I can’t even begin to express how much gratitude I have in my heart.
2021 was… MUCH better than 2020 haha! 2020 was a year of loss for so many, including myself. In an instant, I lost so many loved ones, my work, my friendships, and myself. I have never felt more alone than I did in 2020… but let me tell you, it was absolutely necessary. After feeling so defeated and lost from 2020, I felt like for the first time in a long time, 2021 brought about a glimmer of hope surrounding the future. I also realized that although I can’t change certain circumstances, I can change how I react to them. This was the basis for my year – the most healing and transformative year I’ve ever had.
2021 Reflection- The Most Transformative Year of My Life
Healing and Growth
I am not the same person I was a year ago… and I mean it. Of course, I feel like we are always constantly evolving and growing but this was such a huge year for me personally. The color and brightness that had disappeared previously returned. Once again, I felt lighter, brighter and more colorful than I have in a long time. I wish I could go back and hug my younger self and let her know how amazing, smart, beautiful and strong she is because now that I’m finally on the other side I know this to be true.
This was such a pivotal year in my life. I came to accept the difficult situations I’ve had to go through and let go of the feelings, behaviors, limiting beliefs and trauma associated with these situations. I no longer saw myself as a victim and instead, turned all of these into positives and realized that the decisions that I made have ultimately made it possible to break the cycle of abuse and toxicity for myself and future generations.
I took the entire year “off” from other people and instead focused on myself, something I had never done in my previous life as a people pleaser. I took a hard look at my relationships and realized that I had a pattern of attracting toxic people. The thing about patterns is that it keeps repeating until you learn the lesson and let me tell you…. I learned. It may have taken me a few decades but I learned my lesson and I will definitely be more intentional about who I spend my time with from now on. My heart has been hurt and closed off for a long time and now that I’ve healed myself internally, I finally feel ready to open it up again and it feels so good!
The Journey to Self Love
Having so much time to reflect and heal has given me more than I could have ever asked for. This was the first year of my life that I truly felt confident and experienced self love. I know that sounds crazy but aspects of my childhood ingrained in me the exact opposite. I was made to feel as if I wasn’t enough and that I would never achieve my dreams. I struggled feeling confident in my own skin and this was made even more prevalent when I developed food allergies and felt completely out of control with my body. I felt inadequate in every sense and I believed all the lies that I was told surrounding the way I looked, my talents, my dreams, my intelligence, etc. I was someone that relied heavily on the thoughts and opinions of others. I let their validation influence my entire existence for way too long. I didn’t believe in myself and as a result, I held myself back from so much.
Now I know the truth. The only thing that matters is what I think of me. I don’t need permission from someone else to live my life. Undoing those thoughts was HARD because your mindset becomes second nature. I had to practice and actively change my thoughts into positive ones when I would get down on myself about something. I’m so proud of myself for sticking with it – for sticking with difficult decisions, going through the most painful process I’ve ever experienced and unlearning toxic behaviors in an effort to better myself, my life and my future. This year was not merely about accomplishments but moreso about my personal growth and journey of self discovery. I’m like a whole new person – Lizzie 2.0 hehe! 🙂
Focusing on the Important Things
Making the choice to let go of so much has given me a renewed sense of what’s important in my life. This past year, I started to prioritize myself and the things that I wanted to do. The funny thing is that once I started to prioritize myself, a lot of people fell out of my life. I was no longer a door mat to be taken advantage of. At first, it did hurt but now I feel like I have so much power within me and the guilt I once felt is no longer there.
From all the loss in 2020, I realized truly how short life really is. I made an effort to be more present and to say yes to more things that I wanted to do. There were a lot of firsts in 2021 and so many amazing adventures. We decorated our first home and I got a new car. We took tons of little day trips before my brother left – to the snow, the desert and the mountains. We explored familiar faves like Carmel by-the-sea and Yosemite and explored the new areas surrounding each. And we had boysenberry for the first time at Knott’s Berry Farm. My husband and I celebrated our 13th dating anniversary at Disneyworld, a first for both of us. Of course, everything is different now surrounding travel so I also made the decision to postpone the Italy trip. Even with little set backs, we made things happen and I’m so grateful for the opportunity to make memories (both big and small) with the people in my life that love, support and encourage me to be my best self.
So where do we go from here? Funny enough, my word for 2021 was “growth” and grow I did haha! I feel like it almost manifested itself and that’s truly amazing. For 2022, I chose two words, “transform” and “expand.” I feel that these two words truly embody the process that I am still going through and what I hope to achieve for the future. Now that I’ve transformed myself internally, I’m ready for an outer transformation and the opportunity to expand my skills, talents, and future. I have been SO ready to level up my life and I have a feeling that 2022 is the year that I’ve been waiting for.
After going through this process, I can’t help but feel incredibly grateful for you. You have encouraged me when I needed it the most and have been so supportive of my dreams from day one. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for going through this journey with me and for seeing the things all along that I now see in myself <3
Thank you for reading my 2021 reflection!
Sending you so much love, happiness, good health and prosperity for the new year.
May it be the best one yet!